As we brace for the return of Donald Trump to the US presidency, many of us feel an unsettling déjà vu. The memory of policies, judicial appointments, and a political climate that emboldened racism, transphobia, book bans, and carceral violence hangs heavy. Across the globe, these patterns have sown division and deepened inequality.
Amid this landscape, some white men—who continue to benefit from the status quo—are seeking ways to resist these rising injustices. The role of white settler men is often rightly debated, challenged, and scrutinized. They have long histories of recentering their own needs and creating harm and damage in social movements rather than contributing to meaningful change.
As a white man myself, I’ve grappled with these dynamics in my own work. My dissertation explored how white men come to allyship, the critiques of the concept of allyship and associated roles – accomplicing, race and gender traitors, justice-doing, and solidarity – and how white men may learn from these critiques to contribute to systemic change. This work is deeply informed by the voices of Indigenous, Black, and racialized community leaders, who offered critical guidance on how white men can move beyond good intentions to become active participants in dismantling oppression.
The Foundation: Learning from Community Leaders
The foundation of my research was shaped by an advisory group of Indigenous, Black, and racialized community leaders, most of them women. Their collective wisdom emphasized three critical lessons for white men seeking to engage in allyship:
- Understand that resisting oppression is a lifelong practice
These leaders have spent generations resisting systems of oppression. White men must recognize that they are not stepping into something new but joining an ongoing struggle. - Shift the lens from the “oppressed” to systems of power: Constructing White Men
The group highlighted the importance of examining structures of whiteness, colonialism, and masculinity. “White men” is a socially constructed category that maintains the dynamics of privilege and oppression. Allyship is not about pity, identity, or saviorism but about dismantling the systems that perpetuate harm – including whiteness, hegemonic masculinity, and settler colonialism. - Expectations: unlearn, listen, commit, and act
Community leaders stressed that allyship requires sustained effort. White men must commit to unlearning harmful behaviors, listening deeply, showing up consistently, and taking meaningful action.
These lessons informed every aspect of my research and served as a roadmap for understanding what effective allyship can look like in practice.
How White Men Learn to Ally
From this foundation, I interviewed and observed six white men identified by the advisory group as allies. Through their stories, three key themes emerged:
1. The Starting Points of Allyship
The men reflected on early experiences that predisposed them to allyship, such as:
- Personal victimization: Wanting to spare others the pain they had experienced.
- Community and faith traditions: Learning the value of helping others.
- Challenging white masculinity: Feeling out of step with traditional masculine norms.
- Identity markers: Traits like shyness and curiosity that fostered openness to new perspectives.
These starting points shaped their willingness to engage in justice work, but it was only the beginning.
2. The Process of Learning
Allyship was described as a journey, not a destination. The men identified pivotal moments—such as university courses that introduced concepts of privilege and oppression or personal relationships with marginalized individuals—that reshaped their understanding of the world.
This process often involved deep discomfort. They had to confront how they had benefited from and perpetuated systems of inequality. Over time, these moments of reckoning led to lasting changes in their behavior and worldview. Importantly, this process was iterative; as they learned more, their understanding deepened, requiring them to continually reauthor their relationship with allyship.
3. Allyship as a Relational Practice
Perhaps the most profound insight was that allyship is not an identity but a relational practice. It is not a badge to be earned or a final destination, but an ongoing set of actions grounded in context and connection.
The men identified six key relationships that shaped their allyship:
- With marginalized communities: Listening, learning, and following the leadership of those directly impacted by oppression.
- With other aspiring allies: Building networks of accountability and mutual support.
- With organizations of power: Using privilege to advocate for systemic change within institutions.
- With other white men and women outside justice movements: Engaging in difficult conversations to challenge oppressive behaviors and norms.
- With structures of whiteness, masculinity, and colonialism: Actively working to dismantle the systems that uphold privilege.
- With themselves: Engaging in ongoing self-reflection and unlearning.
These relationships highlight the complexity of allyship—it is deeply personal, inherently collective, and always evolving.
A Resource for Change
Engaging white men in justice work is challenging and burdensome. It is not the responsibility a strategic objective of social movements to educate or guide white men. However, for white men who are genuinely committed to contributing and those who are willing to help, the lessons from this research offer a starting point.
Allyship is hard work. It requires humility, resilience (in challenging our own fragility and white entitlement), and a willingness to make mistakes. But for those who persevere, the rewards are profound: deeper relationships, a sense of purpose, and the opportunity to contribute to a more just and equitable world.
The stakes are high, especially in a moment when inequality and violence threaten to deepen. By embracing the relational practice of allyship, white men can play a meaningful role in resisting these forces and building bridges toward a better future.
The journey is not easy, but it is necessary. To paraphrase critical race scholar David Gillborn, imagine what the world would be like if we didn’t. Together, we can create the change we so desperately need.
Acknowledgement: This work is the collective knowledge of those who contributed to the project: Pam Beebe, Lemlem Haile, Omer Jamal, Fanny Oliphant, Abbas Mancey, Kamal Sehgal, Adrian Wolfleg, Liza Lorenzetti, and thank you to the white men aspiring to allyship (Ryan, Will Tabak, Doug Murphy, Phil, Jerry, and Perry Stein).