Activism & Politics
Book review: Women Can't Hear What Men Don't Say: Destroying Myths, Creating Love, by Warren Farrell
Warren Farrell was in a fabulous position to help men address and change masculinity when he wrote his new book, "Women Can't Hear What Men Don't Say: Destroying Myths, Creating Love." (Putnam Publishing Group, 1999. He could have used this book to help men to rewrite the masculine role in a manner that is much healthier and much more rewarding than the manner in which it exists today. However, that is not what he has done. Contrary to the book's subtitle, it has neither destroyed myths nor created love. It has not charted new territory that could ease communication between the sexes. Rather, it has perpetuated existing myths, and created excuses.
Male involvement in sexual violence prevention has increased sharply over the past decade. Organizations such as Men Can Stop Rape, The Oakland Men’s Project, One In Four, and the White Ribbon Campaign have received tremendous interest from both within, and outside of, the established anti-rape movement. The past ten years have also seen some sexual assault crisis centers (SACCs) renewing the social change “roots” of their work by developing or strengthening primary prevention projects - projects intended to prevent the initial perpetration of sexual violence. Many of these SACCs, sometimes in conjunction with campus-based sexual violence programs, have recognized the need for prevention programming that connects with young men. The rationale for this heightened interest in male-focused programming comes from the fact that males commit the vast majority of sexual violence, and are thus in a powerful position to generate change. To this end, these programs often seek participation from male allies in order to gain greater insight into what types of messages and methods might resonate with men in their larger community, offer positive, non-violent alternatives to traditional masculinity, and/or model constructive cross-gender collaboration.